I used to wonder

I used to wonder how actors could cry on cue. 
I no longer wonder. 
I can do it too.

All I must do
Is drop the mask of denial.
Step out of the numb.
Feel the real.
Acknowledge what's true. 

That there will be no more of his hugs. 
No more of his jokes.  
No more Mother's Day tuna tartare.
No more dancing the worm or busting his chin
Or explaining what happened with his unique quirky grin. 

I used to wonder how anyone could cry on cue.
I no longer wonder.
I do it too.